Diary of a Vacation - continued

On route we decided to find a rest room so that we might be more comfortable. After a long stretch of scenic but winding highway, we came upon three signs – "clean", "flush", "toilets". Carolyn decided to signal and turn into the gas bar when Ruth noticed one more sign – "Phil Has Worms". That was the kicker that turned us all off – and so without missing a beat, Carolyn signaled back onto to the road and we continued. I don’t think the bait sign went well with the theme of clean washrooms! Soon we found a respectable place with washrooms, but once again, Carolyn had some difficulty in the rest room. All I could here from a frantic sounding Carolyn was the word "SHI….." You see Carolyn had drop the car keys in the toilet bowl. Since I was the one with dropsy, this wasn’t expected from Carolyn. Luckily she had just flushed the toilet so at least the water was clean and the keys hadn’t penetrated any further. After a little try off, the keys turned over the ignition and off we were again.

Eventually we found our way to the Olympic town of Lake Placid. Wrong Way Carolyn some how made it into the parking lot of the motel, but only to the annoyance of other drivers trying to navigate around this detoured blue Caddy that was determined to come in the wrong way.

Our accommodations were spacious and quite nice – pool side too. Unpacked and ready for food, we strode off again to the Cadillac with Wrong Way Carolyn, who once again, thought that they had painted the angle parking lines wrong.

We found a nice pasta place to dine at. After dinner Take Charge Phyllis headed for the washroom. You have to understand something about Phyllis. She has great difficulty figuring out those little people characters you see posted on the washroom doors. So in she went – INTO THE MEN’S WASHROOM! Hardly frazzled by the episode, she excused herself and went into the appropriate bathroom. One fellow told Phyllis that she might be quite welcomed in their rest room. I’m not sure if that was a compliment? There would be other episodes (two more in fact) where Take Charge Phyllis would enter the sacred domain of men. In one of these instances, Wrong Way Carolyn followed right behind Phyllis into the men’s room only to notice a man standing there in bewilderment. Ruth inevitably had to ask the question – were his hands up or down? Carolyn was so embarrassed; she just wanted to make the quickest exit as possible. And Take Charge Phyllis didn’t even notice the man!!

Once back in the hotel and after an evening swim in the pool, we decided to get ready for bed. We all seemed thirsty, but only Ruth was still dressed. Ruth devilishly encouraged myself and Carolyn to come with her to the vending machines down the hall. So Ruth headed off along the passageway with Carolyn in her PJ’s and a sweater, and me in my "Pooh" nightshirt and jacket. Strange looks were given by the passerbys. These vending machine vixens turned a few heads while they were dropping their coins in the machine, as Ruth of course (the famous lamp post lady) made the most of it.

In the morning, after one of Ruthie’s marathon morning put togethers, we left the hotel for a "shop till we drop" outing. I think every boutique and antique store in Lake Placid saw our faces and sometimes wallets. Ruth made her big purchase in one of the antique shops; an ornate lead/brass clothing hook featuring a large horse head in the centre. She was so worried about Customs that she had us all going. She was afraid she would be over her limit and for those of you who know Ruth, she kept repeating "I can’t lie". Wrong Way Carolyn assured her that it would be fine since the rest of us weren’t over our limit and she could just pond off some of her purchases to one of us. Still Ruth was skeptical and continued to repeat the commandment "Thou shalt not lie".

Exhausted, we made one more trip to Ben & Jerry’s before opening the trunk of the car one last time and making tracks north to Canada.

The border crossing was a non-event, much to Ruth’s relief. I thought Carolyn handled the nice customs officer well. We stopped for dinner one last time and reminisced about our trip. We must have made an impression in the restaurant as one old gentleman came over to our table to compliment us on our sense of humour. He told us we would all live long lives if we kept that up.

So as we headed out the door, once again Take Charge Phyllis entered the men’s room. I don’t know, but I think her husband should know about her wayward tendencies….

Finally, the car turned down a familiar driveway and the trip was over far too soon. We gave each other a hug and said goodnight.

Back